Wednesday, February 16, 2005
Ayu and i couldn't come for the CCC meeting on Tuesday evening because we had Softball attachment for our SNW. It was from 5.30pm to 7.30pm. It was very tiring for us because we had softball lessons in the morning and attachment in the evening. Everything in juz one day. But we cant miss this attachment. Its the second and the last one. Missing one attachment means we have to make up for two lessons. So do we have a strong reason for not coming to the meeting? Hope so.
I'm still struggling for my EVP assignment. I'm getting fed up with myself, getting pissed off with my own blurness and slow thinking. Juz what are the things that im good at? I cant name anything mann. Its nothing, and i noe that. Wats the use of having grade As in most subjects, when you cant even apply it in practicals? Wats the use of stuffing facts and theories in your brains, and getting good grades, but u cant make use of it in real life situations? Juz wats the use of learning everything in the first place??
I may look studious, serious, hardworking, confident and blah blah blah. But whatever goes inside my mind are the total opposites. I have terrible low self-esteem, and i have BIG loopholes in every knowlegde that i gained. I studied last minute, and i get gd grades, but then i'll forget everything the moment i close the book. So wats the use of it rite? Its juz a temporary thing or information or wateva u call it. Blergh.
Im making things hard for myself. I noe that. But who cares right? Stress is a part of everyone's lives. So juz move on and bear with it.
If im willing to do it, i will do it. I can succeed if i want to succeed. Insyaallah, i'll do wateva i can.
Lets work together ppl. Lets help each other. Lets start NOW!
