Sunday, December 04, 2005
I'm at the highest peak where everything is starting to irritate me. Theres million and one things going around in my head, and i cant possibly solve everything at the same time. I need a place to rest, sit down and calm myself down. Everything is happening in a swift motion, im just irritated. I cant tolerate much longer. Keeping silent is the best, people say. But juz silence wont solve the problem in both situations. So wat now?
Slamming the door wont change things, but out of sheer frustration, i did it just now. Lets hope the door is still standing and holding firmly. Im just mad, irritated and angry. Just what has come over me?
This semester is bad, and everything's not right. Im just not focused, like i always do. Too many things, too little time. Plus this and that, its making me go crazy. I just want a peaceful life, thats it. Is that too much, you tell me?
Is it just human nature to be selfish? Is it human's behaviour to want other people to be unhappy? It is human's satisfaction to see someone else cry?
God noes how much longer i've to endure. Ive heard too many, that i cant stand it anymore. Its involving you indirectly and making you feel more depressed than ever. I need to get a grip, and stand firmly by myself. No one's gonna help me, except Allah Himself. Nothing is more important to me than Him and the family. But at the rate things are going on, im fearful of wat might happen.
Dont ask me why im slient. Dont ask me why im behaving unusual. Dont ask me why im quieter. Dont ask me those questions. Sometimes things are better to be left unsaid. Give me time to get the old Fara back. Give me some space. U never noe what u did may have an impact on someone else. U'll never noe when it hurts someone else.
"A friend in need, is a friend indeed...."
